Adult Talk: The Highs and Lows Of Living At Home

Hi Guys! So I thought I would blog about something a bit different, and something that seems to be occupying my mind a lot at the moment- and that is the grand old housing talk. I turned 23 two weeks ago now (mad how quick that has gone) and this birthday was the first one where I have gone ‘oh shit what am I doing?’ I’ve always preached and will continue to preach to not compare yourself to other people your age, but being 23 has forced me to think ahead more than I would like. Its not even due to pressure from social media, its more so extended family members and family friends- when am I moving out, am I going to buy or rent a property, what type of property am I after, popping out kids anytime soon? Its so annoying! But I just shun off these nosy questions, and continue on my quest to moving out at my own pace.

Yes I’m 23 and working full time, but I also need to learn to drive, get a car and build up a nice lot of money for furniture before I consider moving out. It may be this year or it may be in the next couple of years- and that’s okay. I find that some young people, even though everyone is fully aware that moving out is extremely difficult for us, are judgemental if you say you live with your parents. Especially in the world of dating- yes they may be extremely professional, but they may not have the money to move out yet, and we can’t judge someone for that. Heck we shouldn’t judge anyone period!

I’m quite fortunate in the sense that it is just me and my mum in our house, and my mum has a really hectic life and buzzing social life (one of us has to I guess), that I don’t really see much of her. Which is a shame, but also means I look forward to the time we get to spend together, rather than getting irritated that she is everywhere I turn. How the house is, I would say is more to her taste, particularly downstairs, but if I want to change something, she always lets me. For example I suggested getting a drinks trolley for in the kitchen as all of our spirits are in the pantry and its just inconvenient- and she said that was fine. She doesn’t mind me buying things for the house, even if I am going to be taking them with me when I do move out- its good to buy little bits and bobs as you go along. So already I have kettle, toaster, toastie machine (very important), egg basket (another essential), cushions, bathroom pieces all ready to go into my own pad.

But there are a mixture of highs and lows to living at home, and I’ll begin with the highs…

Travel…

Living at home has meant that I am fortunate enough to travel as frequently as I want (work permitting of course). Last year I had 4 holidays- 4! Which I would not have been able to do if I had my own place. So for now I am enjoying the flexibility to be able to travel when I can. I want to see as much of the world as possible before I get my own pad and will more than likely have to settle for the once a year holiday (first world problems I know).

d0378348dbb149eddb085ff3402cc072

Cheap Rent…

Forget sky high prices, for a box room, all for the sake of having your own space. I pay my mum the amount she requested just to help cover bills (as I am the worst for using so much electric), and my never ending hunger pains, which is next to nothing, compared to other places. I also really weirdly enjoy cleaning, oh and cooking, so we split the cleaning- with me taking charge of upstairs and her downstairs, and I cook 90% of the time which I don’t mind as she does the dishes. It’s a great balance and I’d rather live with my mum and not have to worry about being able to afford to do things, than live in a box room alone all for the sake of having my own space. I understand that there are people who may not have had any choice in this, but if you have a welcoming home, even if you do argue with your parents now and again, and need a spare room just for your clothes (like me), try and come to some sort of compromise instead of leaving the nest for good. My room is a decent enough size, but I was having a situation with my shoes taking over my room, so now I have two shoe racks in my room and my mum made room for one downstairs by the back door for me. This is something that if I was renting a room elsewhere I would find challenging, but something that works for now, but when I do move out will be fine to have my shoes in a separate room if I need to.

391a5be0c134434c8eee008db7a2a4f4

Unlimited Food and Drink…

Like I said earlier, I contribute towards the house in many ways, with one of them being towards food. When I was university my food shop consisted of noodles, cereal, bread and Nutella and a few apples now and again. I didn’t ever have breakfast, lunch dinner- it was more the case of- I’m starving now so I need to eat something. But since graduating what 2 years ago now (that’s crazy) and living at home, I piled all that lost weight back on and I always have my three meals a day. Whereas at university I felt sluggish and wanted nothing but to nap all the time (that’s uni life and alcohol for you), but eating three meals and the right meals, means I am so much more awake and alert and means I don’t suffer from hunger pangs in the night. Its also nice that from having a really nice kitchen to cook in (unlike my uni house one- shudders at the thought), that I have improved my cooking skills and I now look forward to cooking. I know that when I do move out that I won’t go back into that routine of just grab and go food, that I will make proper meals as I enjoy it.

23d479fe5b3865b7d0681e8ed6da7e48

Peaceful Nights…

Think back to uni life and was there never a night where I got my full 8 hours or wasn’t disrupted my either my house mates, the student filled street noises or anything else- it was all noise all the time! When I moved back home, I found it weird that I wasn’t dropping off to the sound of sirens and waking up to the sound of Skepta. Instead I was falling asleep to the sound of the hum of the boiler and waking up to the sounds of birds tweeting- a very different contrast. But although I loved uni, there is no way I could live like that now. I like to be completely relaxed before bed, with candles lit, a good book or magazine to curl up with or a little bit of Netflix and asleep by 10:30 during the working week. I struggle when my partner sleeps over as he snores and likes to fall asleep to the TV. But I’ve introduced him to headphones, so I can sleep and he can watch TV- the snoring has not disappeared unfortunately. But aside from that, I am grateful for a peaceful night where I feel ready for the next day and alert.

4f56f2883affca6fa051fc2b71f8067d

Pay off the Debt…

I only got a credit card I think last year, and I got it purely so I could build up my credit score for when I do want to buy a property. But living at home means that if you do have any big pending debts to pay off- then now is the time! Okay you may not be able to have a social life or ASOS splurge for a month, but it does mean all that debt is gone. I currently have an overdraft to pay off next month and then I’m good and don’t have to worry about it.

76814c37e78213b9fc59192405e39536

Okay so as lovely as this living at home all sounds- and like I said I’m quite fortunate with it just being me and my mum, these are some of the things that for me that are slightly irritating…

‘Where Are You?’ Texts…

You leave them a note in the morning saying that after work your going for a few drinks, text what time the last train is at and the time you will be home, but still you get the “where are you?” message flash up on your phone. If I told my mum that I am going to be out for the night or back the next day, I will still get a “where are you?” message- even when I have given her all of the facts! She says its because she’s a mother and she worries, but when I hop on a plane to go on holiday I don’t get any “travel safe” or “let me know when you’ve landed”– she leaves me to it! The mind boggles.

91881e321799153da55d91d5be47bd49

‘We Have Guests’…

You know when you are just chilling on the sofa watching Dinner Date re-runs, there’s a glass of juice and cup of tea on the side, and your snacking on some toast, and then before you know it your whirlwind mother flies in with “WE HAVE GUESTS COMING IN 10 MINUTES- CLEAN UP THE MESS!!!!” Meanwhile you’re sat there trying to figure out what mess she is referring to, then you realise its you- you are the mess in your dinosaur pyjamas at 3pm on a Saturday. So as a compromise I have lounge-wear to wear around the house on those days when I just don’t want to waste a good outfit in the house, and to prevent my mum from having to apologise for my existence.

363f2bbab9e7f2c1c69eaae8ca2c5b86

Walk Right In…

Thankfully my mum is a knock the door before entering kind of person, but since I made it all through my teenager life without having an awkward encounter with my own parents or my boyfriend at the time parents walking in when we were getting down and dirty, I thought I got it sorted. Hahahahahah…no. The one day my partner had come round and well we hadn’t seen each other in a while and my mum was in, but she was on the phone and I thought I’m usually quiet and stealthy. But whether it was the mixture of adrenaline that we needed to be quick about this, or I had missed my partner more than I thought- my usual quiet and stealthy self had gone out the window and instead replaced with a grateful “Oh my God” kind of person. So later when I went downstairs to get a drink I did not expect to see my mother sat there very pale and scarred. I don’t know what would have been worse, her walking in to see a small snippet, or her hearing the whole performance– either way sorry mama! And lesson learnt!

Alice-facepalm

No Dog…

I have a pet house rabbit called Pebble who I love more than anything! He is so cute, playful and cuddly- but he is not a dog. And I really want a dog- so badly! But my mum has said that I can’t have one until I move out. I know realistically its best not to have one until I am in my own place, as I need somewhere which is neutral so that Pebble doesn’t feel like another animal is invading on his territory, so it makes sense. But the more dog accounts I follow on Instagram, the more it breaks my heart.

Processed with VSCOcam with s1 preset

Processed with VSCOcam with s1 preset

Despite the lows, there are more highs and pros to living at home. For me, right now, its the best option for me, as I want to be able to move out comfortably and afford to decorate my home how I want. It also is allowing me to enjoy my social life and ability to travel more. Adulthood is stressful and can sometimes be confusing, so having my family nearby to support me is what I need.

What do think about living at home- easy or hard?

I hope your having a wonderful day

Love always,

Gemma

xo

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s